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Friday, April 14, 2006

Top Ten Reasons I Love Being An Accountant
  
CPA training ensures I'm cool in high-pressure situations, like calculating the tip at Applebee's
While other poor losers go off to work in jeans and sneakers, I get to wear a suit
You haven't lived until you've filled out form 3277
What can I say I'm an adrenaline junkie
I'm on such good terms with the IRS, I haven't paid taxes since '89
I like to lick the envelopes
Like the president, I only work one month a year
After April 15th, I spend the year eating Pringles and watching rasslin'
Women don't expect much in the bedroom
I fudge a couple of numbers and the next thing you know they're hauling Letterman's ass off to prison
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The look on a client's face when I tell 'em their ass is gettin' audited

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After a few drinks, I start getting these mind-blowing ideas for deductions

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Office where I work has free instant soup packets

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I got one of those chairs that spins around and around and around and around and around

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No one gives a crap that I'm all juiced up on steroids

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Honestly, I can't think of a damn thing

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